“No da, I will remain outside thinking of Ramana and Seshadri!”

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Seshadri Swamigal of Thiruvannamalai

Gowrishankar Mama

 

My brother Chandrasekhar, was like my Lakshmana although I am not a Rama by any means. He was a Corporal in IAF. Due to a wrong injection he was on the verge of Coma and was admitted to Southern Command Military Hospital and was in a special ward in Poona. I rushed from Calcutta to see him. There was a Dr Narayana Iyer, a Brigadier who was treating my brother.

He told me, “Only one in 10,000 recover from this, so it is not our hands. Pray to your God and Acharyas”.

I came to my Mother. “Why did you leave him at the hospital alone?”, asked my mother.

“I wanted to see Kanchi Mahaperiyava that is why I came home”.

“Will you come with me”, I asked her.

“Leave me at Thiruvannamalai, I want to be with Seshadri and Ramana”, said she.

“I had taken a Sankalpam to see Him first and hence will drop you at Thiruvannamalai after seeing Him”, I told her.

We both went to Kanchipuram. Swamigal was not there and was at Orirukkai to attend the 1001st birthday celebrations of Thirumisai Ahzwar. We reached Orirukkai at 6 in the morning my mother decided to sit outside on a stone beneath a tree.

“Amma, you are anyway following the customs of a widow after tonsuring your head in Kashi and wearing white saree, why don’t you come in and have His darshan?”

“No da, I will remain outside thinking of Ramana and Seshadri. You take me to Thiruvannamalai after you are done having Swamigal’s darshan”.

Miffed at her reply I told her, “What, do you really think Ramana Bhagawan and Seshadri Swamigal will bless you if you intentionally do not have the darshan of Kanchi Mahaswamigal?”

“See, now stop arguing. You may go and have His darshan, I am not stopping you. I will just be outside”, she replied.

Telling her that even a hundred Ramanas and Seshadris will be unable to help her, I came inside the room to meet Swamigal and prostrated to Him.

Filled with grief for my brother’s condition I became emotional and recited this to Him from Thiruvempaava.

‘un kaiyil pillai unakke adaikkalam endru….’

Overcome with emotions I could not complete this paasuram. After I regained composure in a minute or so. He said, “Please complete reciting the pasuram!”

I completed it, the 19th Paasuram

uN^kaiyiR piLLai unakkE adaikkalam enRu
aN^gap pazanychoR pudhukkum em achchaththAl
eN^gaL perumAn unakkon RuraippOmkEL
eN^koN^gai n^in anbar allArthOL chEraRka
eN^kai unakkallA dheppaNiyuny cheyyaRka
kaN^gulpagal eN^kaN maRRonRuN^ kANaRka
iN^gip parichE emakkeN^kOn n^algudhiyEl
eN^gezilen nyAyiRu emakkElOr empAvAy

உன் கையில் பிள்ளை உனக்கே அடைக்கலம், என்று
அங்கு அப் பழஞ்சொல் புதுக்கும் எம் அச்சத்தால்,
எங்கள் பெருமான், உனக்கு ஒன்று உரைப்போம், கேள்!
எம் கொங்கை நின் அன்பர் அல்லார் தோள் சேரற்க;
எம் கை உனக்கு அல்லாது எப் பணியும் செய்யற்க;
கங்குல், பகல் எம் கண் மற்று ஒன்றும் காணற்க.
இங்கு இப் பரிசே எமக்கு எம் கோன் நல்குதியேல்,
எங்கு எழில் என் ஞாயிறு எமக்கு?’ ஏல் ஓர் எம்பாவாய்!

Meaning:
“The child in your hand is your own refugee”, because of our fear of that adage coming to existence, our Lord, we tell you something, listen ! Let our breast not join the shoulder of somebody who is not Your lover; Let my hand not do any service other than for You; Night or day let my eye not see anything else. If You, my Lord, give us this gift, let the Sun rise wherever, what is our problem ?

<< thanks to Shaivam.org>>

“Have you come alone?”, asked Swamigal.

“No with my mother.”

“So, what is the matter?”

Told Him about the condition of my brother, somehow wrongly as dialysis.

“Is the kidney affected?”, He asked.

“No.”

He pointed to His head.

“Yes the brain is affected”, I said.

He took some Kungumam in a Thamarai Lotus leaf in His hand, closed His eyes in dhyanam for a minute and gave it to me.

“Are you going to Calcutta now?”

“No, I will drop my mother at Thiruvannamalai and then go to Poona before going to Calcutta”.

He said, “Send kungumam to your brother in Poona immediately.”

He spoke to other devotees for another 10 minutes.

After that, He adjusted His kaupeenam loin cloth, got up, removed His Kaavi vastram, folded it twice and put it on His shoulder, held His Dandam in His left hand and left for outside, much to my utter shock and surprise!

The Kaupeenadhari walked some distance to near where my mother was sitting. She was startled to see Him and fell down at His feet, crying inconsolably!

Periyava’s first question to her was, “Where is your Maatamaha Poorvigam”?

She said Thiruvannamalai.

She was pleased with this question of His about Bhagawan.

“Have you seen Seshadri Swamigal? Has He come to your home?”, He asked.

“Yes!”

“What will he do?”

“He will ask me to give Him cooked rice. I will tell Him, it is very hot. He will brush me away and say, I am very hungry. And then He will dip His bare hands into the hot cooked rice and eat. After just two mouthfuls he will spit some, and all of us will rush to eat them!”

“Have you seen Ramana Bhagawan?”, He asked.

“Yes, we will sing before Him!”

“You must have sang Akshara Mana Malai?”

“Yes! From 3.30 am to 11 am we tell prayers like Venkateswara Suprabhatam, Bhagavad Gita , Vallalaars’s Thiruvarutpa and sing songs continuously!”, she replied.

“Where are you going now?”

“I have asked him to take me to Thiruvannamalai.”

And then Periyava started to walk.

My mother was ecstatic that Swamigal spoke to her about Bhagavan and Seshadri Swamigal.

She exclaimed to me, “Did you see Him? You said He is Periyava but He came to me in the form of a Kaupeenadhari like Ramana Himself! His body is so lustrous just like Bhagawan’s! His Mind also seemed just like Ramana’s! And did you notice that His voice was ditto like the way Seshadri Swamigal used to speak!!”

It dawned on me a couple of days later that for a person who did not want to have darshan of Periyava and sought only Ramana and Seshadri Swamigal, Periyava blessed her by coming in the form of Ramana Himself and speaking like Seshadri Swamigal Himself!

Can there be a better Kaarunyam!!!

Shankara. Gripping.

In a couple of days I sent the kungumam to my brother. It was applied on his forehead and all over the body by my friend. He woke up in delirium at approximately 11 pm and started shouting feverishly Periyava, Periyava. He tried to do something but fell down from the bed crying “Oh, I am a sinner, I am unable to prostrate to Him, He is leaving..” etc!

He later told me that Periyava came to Him at the hospital and observed him minutely two to three times from head to feet. “I was helpless that I could not prostrate to Him”, he said.

“This is the Truth, I saw Him at the bedside in the hospital!!!”, said my brother!

*****

Narrated by the supremely blessed Thiruvannamalai Gowrishankar Mama.

Shankara.